Sunday 28 June 2009
- About Miss Pauline }
It's time to know more about pauline,who she really is....
First and foremost,I am back to blogging session. Sorry, I really have no idea why I started blogging in 2007. But anyway, that was quite a pretty good choice as I know where can I post some of daily events. And perhaps as a reminiscence when I'm getting old.
I noticed that although I was born in a broken family but I live my lives to the fullest. My God is the greatest God, he found me, he helped with my weaknesses, he helped me to overcome my trials and pains. He still loves me! I would say we as human have our own weaknesses, but if you are willing to take a step forward to overcome those weaknesses -Yes, I believe all can be done with God's mercy and grace.
When I was in pre-school (presbyterian kindergarden), my schoolmates or classmates always giving me a hard time by asking "So, what are your parents doing?". And when it comes to "parent's day" it was the hardest time ever. Another hardship for me when they asked "How come your parents are not here for you?". Okay, I would simply said "Oh! Cos my father is in JB, busy working and my mummy is at home". I mean, those are truth but it is just that they are not by my side.
But I'm thankful that my aunty or sometimes my grandpa would be there for me. My grandparents are my parents, my aunties and uncles are my parents. They're the closest kins to me. Just like parasite.
Ever since attending kindergarden, I always kept this to myself "Why? Why I born in this family? Why I have no parents?". I do have parents but I just don't have a complete family. Imagine how parents could bring such a huge impact to their kids when they were not contemplating their children's needs, feelings and emotions. Their decisions were selfish! What about me?
I was quite unhealthy when I was still in young age, as my sisters and brothers were taken good care by my parents. However, when my mom gave birth to me I have nothing but my grandparents. Thank my Heavenly Father, he taught me to be strong. Whenever I was attending the kindergarden's prayer session, I was always being so attentive, prayed to God and knew that He's always listening to my needs. I know I still have him, he's my refuge and my shelter.
As I grow, that kind of hurt, sadness, loneliness and emptiness are still following me, like whenever there's a light there will be a shadow.They never leave me until today. I remembered back in secondary school, I kind of not rebellious but felt like dating. So, I sort of dated a guy but we were kind of friends although we were in a relationship. After 5 months of being together, I knew this is not what I was looking for. Not a guy nor a relationship. But we were good friends not couple. Girls are still soft-hearted and emotional, after the break up I cried and played truants. All I can say is SILLY & CRAZY ! Thank God, it didn't affect my studies but sort of blacklisted in school. A convent girl like me at my secondary school time was a scandal.
I baptised when I was only in secondary school and I even draw near to God. My pastor named me "pauline", that was how I was named pauline. Time shifted to SPM period, I stood on my feet even stronger knew that I have my God. I did well with good results in SPM. At that time, my elder sis already working in Singapore for quite a few years and she recommended me to study in Singapore.
So and so ....I came to Singapore to pursue my Diploma. During first year of studies, a guy had a crush on me. He wanted me to be his gf. Honestly, I do not like him but I decided to date him because of my loneliness. He was my first official bf and ex-bf. Being the youngest in the family, I have nobody to talk to. I knew my family is not gonna like it anyway-the idea that I'm gonna have a bf. My brothers ? My sisters and I, we have quite a big gap generation, so we never chat. It did affected my studies when I spent to much time into relationship.
Guess what, after a few months we broke up because of some reasons. I was devastated with the idea of break up. After everything, I realised although my family were not always there for me when I need them but the truth is they are always with me. My family loves me and I need them. Why should I conceal my feelings from them? I cried devastatingly and not able to put the broken pieces of my heart back again. I am glad at that time my aunty was there for me in singapore, she comforted me and with me all the time. Of course, time proves everything and a wound needs time to heal. And it did but there's scar lefted behind.
I stood up again and carried on with my studies. Know that I need to complete my studies. Until today, I learnt this is the journey of life. Whenever you fell, you gained a lesson. There is nothing that I need to hide. And according to my analysis, I did not succeed in a relationship because I did not being frank and bold. There was no trust, no faith, no communication and no security in my past relationship. My ex wasn't know my family background. I didn't mention it to them (EVER), quiver that they can't accept me. Hey,grown up! After attending lots of the church lessons, I learnt how to better handle a relationship. And I believe if God blessed that guy to me, we shall be together. And you is you, be frank and build trust not HIDE.
I know what is the purpose of a relationship (everyone needs a partner okay! we need to be loved. Sometimes just the timing isn't rite yet, don't rush) and if you have found one perhaps everything is going well, good effort, keep it up. God bless ! A partner in your life is important, who wants to get old and live in the old folk's home without having any children. We all want to be merrier with our loved ones in a warmth and cosy (home sweet home). It is good to get one, but for teenagers out there you have to be sure of what is a relationship and its purpose. Don't ever defeat the purpose and privileges that God has given to us. And don't ever get into it until you are ready and with family's approval. This is absolutely vital.
For me, God has already planned someone out there for me. I just need to be patient and wait for God's time. In everything, there is a time but not your time. It is the God's time. If that man or woman is for you, God will bless.
RELATIONSHIP In Theory:
What is it: A man and a woman gets to know each other. Starts with friendship, if steady, then relationship.
When you are ready?: Physically,emotionally, financially, spiritually,family's approval.
Check this :Character, personality, good & bad points, compatibility, family background,religion.
Building a relationship :
~Share life goals {future, goals & aspirations, going on the same direction}.
~Learn to communicate openly.
~Cultivate true,realistic expectations.
~Develop common interests.
~Work through conflicts, solve problems together (Give and take).
~Start a budget / savings plan.
~Be patient to each other, love each other, trust and communication is important.
True love means your partner could accept your past and present. True love also means it can stands against the time, trials and tests. True love also involves the trust and faith. True love never fails.
As a summary, everything happens for a reason. It is God's plans. But no matter what is it, face it because this is just a small chapter of your life. Don't give up, for God is still on the throne and He's still rules. Give Him praise and seek Him for His love never fails. I also love my family even more. Amen.
This is life. The journey of life. Face it, don't hide it and you will find the truth and happiness in life. God bless.
First and foremost,I am back to blogging session. Sorry, I really have no idea why I started blogging in 2007. But anyway, that was quite a pretty good choice as I know where can I post some of daily events. And perhaps as a reminiscence when I'm getting old.
I noticed that although I was born in a broken family but I live my lives to the fullest. My God is the greatest God, he found me, he helped with my weaknesses, he helped me to overcome my trials and pains. He still loves me! I would say we as human have our own weaknesses, but if you are willing to take a step forward to overcome those weaknesses -Yes, I believe all can be done with God's mercy and grace.
When I was in pre-school (presbyterian kindergarden), my schoolmates or classmates always giving me a hard time by asking "So, what are your parents doing?". And when it comes to "parent's day" it was the hardest time ever. Another hardship for me when they asked "How come your parents are not here for you?". Okay, I would simply said "Oh! Cos my father is in JB, busy working and my mummy is at home". I mean, those are truth but it is just that they are not by my side.
But I'm thankful that my aunty or sometimes my grandpa would be there for me. My grandparents are my parents, my aunties and uncles are my parents. They're the closest kins to me. Just like parasite.
Ever since attending kindergarden, I always kept this to myself "Why? Why I born in this family? Why I have no parents?". I do have parents but I just don't have a complete family. Imagine how parents could bring such a huge impact to their kids when they were not contemplating their children's needs, feelings and emotions. Their decisions were selfish! What about me?
I was quite unhealthy when I was still in young age, as my sisters and brothers were taken good care by my parents. However, when my mom gave birth to me I have nothing but my grandparents. Thank my Heavenly Father, he taught me to be strong. Whenever I was attending the kindergarden's prayer session, I was always being so attentive, prayed to God and knew that He's always listening to my needs. I know I still have him, he's my refuge and my shelter.
As I grow, that kind of hurt, sadness, loneliness and emptiness are still following me, like whenever there's a light there will be a shadow.They never leave me until today. I remembered back in secondary school, I kind of not rebellious but felt like dating. So, I sort of dated a guy but we were kind of friends although we were in a relationship. After 5 months of being together, I knew this is not what I was looking for. Not a guy nor a relationship. But we were good friends not couple. Girls are still soft-hearted and emotional, after the break up I cried and played truants. All I can say is SILLY & CRAZY ! Thank God, it didn't affect my studies but sort of blacklisted in school. A convent girl like me at my secondary school time was a scandal.
I baptised when I was only in secondary school and I even draw near to God. My pastor named me "pauline", that was how I was named pauline. Time shifted to SPM period, I stood on my feet even stronger knew that I have my God. I did well with good results in SPM. At that time, my elder sis already working in Singapore for quite a few years and she recommended me to study in Singapore.
So and so ....I came to Singapore to pursue my Diploma. During first year of studies, a guy had a crush on me. He wanted me to be his gf. Honestly, I do not like him but I decided to date him because of my loneliness. He was my first official bf and ex-bf. Being the youngest in the family, I have nobody to talk to. I knew my family is not gonna like it anyway-the idea that I'm gonna have a bf. My brothers ? My sisters and I, we have quite a big gap generation, so we never chat. It did affected my studies when I spent to much time into relationship.
Guess what, after a few months we broke up because of some reasons. I was devastated with the idea of break up. After everything, I realised although my family were not always there for me when I need them but the truth is they are always with me. My family loves me and I need them. Why should I conceal my feelings from them? I cried devastatingly and not able to put the broken pieces of my heart back again. I am glad at that time my aunty was there for me in singapore, she comforted me and with me all the time. Of course, time proves everything and a wound needs time to heal. And it did but there's scar lefted behind.
I stood up again and carried on with my studies. Know that I need to complete my studies. Until today, I learnt this is the journey of life. Whenever you fell, you gained a lesson. There is nothing that I need to hide. And according to my analysis, I did not succeed in a relationship because I did not being frank and bold. There was no trust, no faith, no communication and no security in my past relationship. My ex wasn't know my family background. I didn't mention it to them (EVER), quiver that they can't accept me. Hey,grown up! After attending lots of the church lessons, I learnt how to better handle a relationship. And I believe if God blessed that guy to me, we shall be together. And you is you, be frank and build trust not HIDE.
I know what is the purpose of a relationship (everyone needs a partner okay! we need to be loved. Sometimes just the timing isn't rite yet, don't rush) and if you have found one perhaps everything is going well, good effort, keep it up. God bless ! A partner in your life is important, who wants to get old and live in the old folk's home without having any children. We all want to be merrier with our loved ones in a warmth and cosy (home sweet home). It is good to get one, but for teenagers out there you have to be sure of what is a relationship and its purpose. Don't ever defeat the purpose and privileges that God has given to us. And don't ever get into it until you are ready and with family's approval. This is absolutely vital.
For me, God has already planned someone out there for me. I just need to be patient and wait for God's time. In everything, there is a time but not your time. It is the God's time. If that man or woman is for you, God will bless.
RELATIONSHIP In Theory:
What is it: A man and a woman gets to know each other. Starts with friendship, if steady, then relationship.
When you are ready?: Physically,emotionally, financially, spiritually,family's approval.
Check this :Character, personality, good & bad points, compatibility, family background,religion.
Building a relationship :
~Share life goals {future, goals & aspirations, going on the same direction}.
~Learn to communicate openly.
~Cultivate true,realistic expectations.
~Develop common interests.
~Work through conflicts, solve problems together (Give and take).
~Start a budget / savings plan.
~Be patient to each other, love each other, trust and communication is important.
True love means your partner could accept your past and present. True love also means it can stands against the time, trials and tests. True love also involves the trust and faith. True love never fails.
As a summary, everything happens for a reason. It is God's plans. But no matter what is it, face it because this is just a small chapter of your life. Don't give up, for God is still on the throne and He's still rules. Give Him praise and seek Him for His love never fails. I also love my family even more. Amen.
This is life. The journey of life. Face it, don't hide it and you will find the truth and happiness in life. God bless.
posted by Pauline
-05:15-
-05:15-